I wish someone could answer all my questions
The why's and why nots of life
The where , when and how?
It seems simple doesnt it
Then why dont I have answers

Certain things are better left unsaid
Better left unexplained
For it is for me to understand
For it is for me to explain
I may be at a loss
But there is always a reason behind
That eludes me skillfuly

Will I ever know?
Will He ever tell me?
Where are my signs?

I wanted to fly high
I wanted to ride the waves
I wanted to feel the high
I wanted to live my life

Now I want to leave it all behind
Closing a chapter of life
I want to start anew
Let me make it up to you

I haven't been there
I know, I know
I never wanted to
I was happy being mine

I didn't have the time
I didn't bother to make time
I was on my own
I was away from it all

Lets start now
Before I change my mind
Let me be there
Let me be with you

Let me see them grow
Let me hold their hands
Let me see them laugh
Let me see them cry

We'll get along fine
We'll chase the butterflies as it dawns
We'll chase the shadows by the dark
I'll hold them tight lest I go away again
I won't , I can't
I want to be there
I will be there

Give me a chance
I won't let you down
I promise

Cheers
rt

What do all these expressions mean?



She (Hands covering the mouth) : "You haven't changed!!!!!!"



When will you ever change!!!!!



She : "Oohh...what a cute kid!!!"



I have to see his dad!!!!!



He(sad look): " Sorry , I wasn't able to make it"

She : " No, that's okay.No problem"



"I didn't want you to come in the first place, you loser"



He(all excited) : "C'mon lets get started"

She(send up a silent prayer) : "Sure darling"


Oh no! Not again

She: How do you want your burger - medium or rare?

He: Oh I'm fine with anything dear!

Does that mean you know the difference?God Help.

X ( with a heavy Spanish accent) :"Sorry about that. I don't speak good english. I am poor at it"

Me ( Indian accent ofcourse! No! Don't get me wrong. Simple Indian! Not the Americanised " so doood, wassszzzup" accent) : " That's okay. No problem. Please put me on to Mr X"

I am on the phone waiting to be routed to Mr X. What a long wait. The incessant tune at the other end gets on my nerves. La La La La La. Am waiting. 2...3....4......5.....the clock keeps ticking away. X comes back on the line.

X : "Sorry Madammee(pause)....but he iz not there. (Long Pause) Call later?"

Me: "oh:( Sure. Thanks. I'll try tomorrow"

X:Sorry. I speak no english.

Me: Thanks, I'll try tomorrow. Bye

How many of us Indians would openly admit to not being able to speak good english. Not many I suppose. Do we take pride in being able to speak fluently in our mother tongue. Not many hands will go up now either. The Queens english. That was what we wanted to master. American English, without the G's. How you doing man! That's what we speak now. Not a sentence goes w/o being peppered abundantly with 'like'. So I was like....' damn how could you do that'

Well well well. I don't know if its a passing phase or if further generations will end up not being able to understand, converse or write in their mother tongue.

Anybody answers?

I stand there
As a new day dawns
My feet burried deep in the sand
Waves curl up to trace the feet
As they doff the sand
I dig my feet further deep
The waves curl up yet again
Let's not change
Let's be the same

Etched in the sands of time
Memories linger on
Different paths we have tread
Different experiences we have to share
Tides of time attempt to wash away the past
To make it none, but a speck in the distant past
Let's not change
Let's be the same

I'll go through it with you
The bond won't gather dust
I promise!
Matters of the heart or the head
A whoop of joy or a word of regret
The first to know
You have always been
Will always be
I promise!

Something is missing
Yet everything is just so right
So much to look forward to
The highest of the highs
The lowest of the lows
We've just started
A long way to go
Still.................

The road may go two ways
We may choose to go different ways
To chase our dreams
To live the one life that we have to live
Eternal optimists we will remain
Drawing inspiration from everybody
As the world around continues to spin!

Laughing at silly nothings
That only we will understand
Slapping our knees over a cup of coffee
As memories of the past weave in and out
Talking at the top of our voices
Laughter ringing out loud in the cafe
While people around us wonder if we've gone beserk

Talk
Of school days, college, work et al
Of little nothings
Of the innumerable crushes that we have had
Of life
Of what lies ahead
Of what's in store
Of what's over
Of what we could have done right in the past
Of what went wrong
Of anxieties and worries
Of dreams and desires
Of hopes
Of us and the rest of the world
Of how abnormal we are
Of how normal the rest of the world is
Of everything and anything

Carefree days may be long gone
Replaced by a sense of responsibility
Towards ourselves
And to the people whom we love

Miles apart
Yet etched are the memories
But a phone call away
We'll keep in touch!!!

I promise:)

Either this way or that
She leaves it vague
She leaves it unanswered
Open-ended it remains
A bit too mystifying

Words remain as thoughts
Lest she hurt someone
Lest she hurt herself
Better left unsaid
Untouched it is
Untouched it will be

With her it will go to the grave
Secrets, anything but ephemeral
Unless expressions give it all away
Unless she can't take it anymore
Unless she gets the courage to confront it
Unless she is forced to admit it
Unless she finds someone she can share it with

Laughter fills the room
She is drawn away from her thoughts
She is all but 15!
She breaks out in a little victory dance
She gives them all a bear hug
Plants a kiss on her brother's forehead!
Only person to call family:(
'He deserves it all', she prides!
Smiles all around!
Cheer all around!

For a second, if only!
She forgets
That she had been a victim!

Emotions. The bedrock of our existence. Joy, sorrow, optimism,envy,disgust, worry, boredom, loneliness, fear, anxiety......the list is endless. Sounds too cliched? Rephrase it the way you want to. You'll come right back to the same conclusion.

We weave in and out of each one of these emotions everyday and I'd be goddamned surprised if there weren't more. Do we possess enough skill to differentiate among the various emotions. Yes. A resound yes! But, think. What if we were not?What if every emotion seemed just the same to us. What if the death of a close one seemed just the same as the birth of a new one. What is being sacked from your job seems just the same as bagging that 'dream job'? What if the highs that you get from preparing to go on a long holiday to an exotic location, away from the humdrum of city life and the constant buzz that envelopes your workplace, feels just the same as getting up in the morning only to get started with chores that are part of your daily routine. Bizzare? That' a euphemism! Freaks you out! Totally!!:)

So what is it that I am trying to say here. All am saying is this! Feel every emotion. Ride every wave. Surf the crests of life. Hit the troughs. LOL for good health. If you want to worry about something, go ahead. Worry just enough to find the solution to the problem, but don't make it a way of life. Confused? Stressed? Find a sounding board. Bored? Twiddling your thumbs? Go get some fresh air!

Different Emotions! Different Experiences!

Cheers!

Young adults, that's what we become when we turn 21 or 22. From then on begins a journey that will be marked by decisions at every living moment. Now that's an exxageratiom some may counter. Okay, probably not every living moment but atleast a major portion of it. People do not treat you as kids anymore. Conversations that you were never a part of before, never offered an opinion on or times when you simply left the room when relatives began discussing something that you would rather be ignorant about(you will hear it from your mother later anyways:P), become a thing of the past. It's not a huge transition or anything, just that one shoulders more responsibility on the way to becoming an adult! More decisions. More mistakes. More lessons learned the hard way. Whoops! Hang on! Did I mention that right! Yeah I think I did! Adult!!!!

"I'd rather not become one", some might say.

"Why don' they invent a time machine or something that would let me stay right here, for now and ever. Am in love with life. 'Young adults', yeah I quite like that",others may offer!

"Not a chance! In your dreams", the more sane ones counter!

After all Shakespeare didn't write the All the World's a Stage as a farce. At the end of it all, don't we all want to say Been there. Done that!!!:)

Cheers

Change! Are we ready for it?

Am sure each one of us have been through a lot of changes in life, both personal and professional. Are we always ready for it? Do we rant and fume, stomping both our feet, strutting up and down, that this has happened(if we least expected it to) or do we maintain a dignified front and take it in our stride. Perspectives differ and so do reactions. Drastically, that too!

I have lived, studied and worked in three different cities. But all this was willed upon ones' self. I chose to do it. I raved about my first move away from home. I ranted about the second. I wanted to get back home. I chose to tread the middle ground on the third occassion.

I realised change is considered alarming only when unexpected. Only when it is an uninvited guest. Otherwise you just learn to live with it and make the best out of it. Handle change resourcefully and you will realise, whatever happens, happens for the best!

Cheers!!

If someone were to give me a blank sheet of paper and ask me to pen my thoughts down, I would surely have a tough time. It would all tumble down as a jumble of thoughts and to make sense of it all would take up quite sometime for me, leave alone some arbit person trying to figure out what I have put down. To cut a long story short - complex - that's how it will all be!

I've wondered, not once, but like a zillion times, what the need is for such complexities in life? Sometimes it is like you are bringing it on yourself, but for no other reason than you have nothing else to do! You don't feel like doing anything, so you just let your mind wander, do the honours and the come back to its righteous place. Just that at the end of it all, you wish you really had something to do, just so that your mind would stay where it actually needs to and do what it is meant to!.......There I go.....am doing it again! ...complicating a very simple sentence!:)

Quite a few people have very simple equations in life. Add a bit of this, take away a bit of that, dust it at the sides, shape it at the corners, nudge it a bit and bingo, life falls into place! Exactly the way they want it to. Very simple. No more wants. No more needs. Happy with what they have. Ecstatic! Peace! They kind of redifine Maslow's Hierarchy to fall in step with their life!

Two sides to a coin? Oh yes, ofcourse! People who are just not satisfied with what they have. Too many wants. Too many desires. Too many variables ...too complex an equation. Give them some more time, they would probably add more levels to Maslow's Hierarchy and find their names mentioned in some Intro to Pschylogy book! It would probably take forever to solve their million equations in life!!! Chuck!

And then there are the middle men! Who have a foot here and a foot there, not knowing where to go. Quite guilty about wanting more in life and at the same time not fully satisfied with what they have. They consider such situations to sort of question their ability to achieve more. "Like hell I can't do this" keeps ringing at the back of their heads. Convinced that they want more, confused as to why they want more, when they have it all???? A tad puzzling isn't it!!

Is life a cakewalk? I wish!!!:)

Cheers!:)

Sometimes it becomes a tad difficult to understand yourself:) Times when you yourself can not find explanations to what's going on;explanations to convince yourself or otherwise. Are you trying to broker a compromise between the inner and outer world? Damn, I wish I knew:)...wrong smiley.....heck it does not matter:) Wrong again, but am smiling...don't really know what the emoticon for confused is...so this will do for now:)

Times when you jus want to curl up with a good book and a mug of piping hot coffee, simply lost to the outside world. Peace! Or let your fingers fly over the keyboard. Just what am doing now. May not make sense , but simply put, just a roller coaster ride for my thoughts! Vince Flynn and coffee, just not right for this moment I guess.


Quarter Life Crisis...what else!!!:)

Can it get any better?

What can get better than...

• Spending time with the people whom you love the most
• Catching up with friends over a steaming cuppa
• A mail from a close friend that just reads ' Was thinking of you, just a mail to say Hi!:) you are the best'
• Mom's food
• The wind in your hair on a boat ride
• Smiling babies on a pram / stroller..handsome daddies are an add-on:P
• A coffee on the way back home from work
• Hot soup at the end of a hard day's work
• Being appreciated for your culinary skills although you know you suck big time
• Knowing that you are at your best when independent:)
• Having the whole weekend just to yourself doing what you like doing the most
• Buying the little somethings for people whom you love the most
• A rom-com to beat the blues
• Going online to see one of your best buddies online and game for a quick chat a thousand miles away
• Curling up to read a book by an Indian author although you end uf dozing even before you flip the first few pages
• Being invited over by someone whom you know cooks well
• Seeing things that you have never seen before, doing things that you have never done before
• An intellectually stimulating conversation that re-ignites your grey cells

Little do we know where the path leads

Walk the path

Difficult as it may seem

Take a minute to look back

Then will we realise

It has been a helluva ride

That will stand us in good stead:)

For now and forever:)

Cheers

rt

Different people ... different perspectives
Small talk , oh yes, 5 minutes and not more
Snow , rain, the sweltering heat
Weather forecasting -the all time saviour
Ah cut the crap:)
Why pretend - you can't, simply can't

Knows me inside out.
Can read me like the back of her hand
My every move
I am cornered
Hour long conversations
Latte guzzlers , that we are
Endless discussions
Arguments - we can live with that
Lending each other a ear
Girly talk you may think
Far from it
Ignited minds
Thoughts just rant off
Top of the mind,
No ' will mind?' doubts
No guilt trips
Cliched as it may sound

Different people
Different relationships
Little do we know y?

I cleared my throat. I was not going to let go of this opportunity. ”Am I good enough?” I had had enough of these questions for quite sometime now. After all I would never know unless I tried. It seemed like ages since I had stood in front of an audience. Okay, honestly I admit that I have never performed to an audience. At least not this kind of stuff! I have aced elocutions and debates, but SINGING, completely out of my league. I have however always fantasized singing that perfect song, with all the chords and notes exactly in place, dancing that perfect dance with not a single step out of place. “DREAMER”, people used to chide me. “Hey it’s just a dream, not that I have made a fool of myself already’, I used to retort. I may not be an accomplished singer, hell, I’m not even an amateur, but I can proudly say that I stick to appreciation, that too if I have nothing else to do and if the song is remotely familiar to me. Even then I only lend as much as a fleeting ear to it. Doesn’t make me much of a prodigy does it? Prodigy????? Do I even know the definition? :)

I had always maintained a dignified front. Always doing things that I was good at. I had drawn my own boundaries, never testing unknown waters. A resolute Capricorn? Yeah I guess so, in more ways that one I should say!

Ah well, I realized that it was time to do the things that I so wanted to do. Someone had once told me – ‘One life. Live it’. How true!!! The right moment to do something never will come. Every moment is the perfect moment and there is nothing like the present to simply go for it.

And so, there I was bang in front of an audience of 50, yeah maybe, at least as far as I could see, with a mike in my hand, clearing my throat. I wanted to pinch myself and ask if this was for real! Apparently my eyes say so! Thank heavens this was not some cut-throat competition, just an informal get-together of university folks.

Through the corner of my eyes, I could see my best friend standing by the curtains, with her thumbs up and a broad grin! Ah well, I had nothing to lose. There were no critics in the audience. I didn’t believe in critics anyways. They were just people who knew the route but didn’t know how to drive. I pat myself. I was in the driver’s seat! Even before the first note escaped my mouth the veena player began to strum. Ah, it’s now or never!! I began to sing. A few notes went astray but I was able to hold fort managing to keep the pace of the song. The tempo began to rise and I completely lost myself as I got into the groove of the song. And voila! The last note and finally it was all over. I didn’t dare to open my eyes and look at the audience. Not that I wanted to hear encore. But the mildest of claps would be enough not to shatter my ego and make my day. Ah there it was, someone clapped and a few more followed suit. I opened my eyes, bowed, and got up with a broad grin nearly touching my eyes. Been there, done that. I walked out and got a bear hug from my friend! Not the mellifluous of songs, yet I was ecstatic! I had done something that I never though I would be able to.

Phew, a sigh of relief! Finally, there it was, a new beginning, a starter, an appetizer, the main course is yet to come!!!!! :)

Disclaimer: That was just a piece of fiction! ‘I‘am still waiting for the right moment!!!!! :)

Go-getters or No-getters

She nudged me,
Do I turn?
"What if?" rang loudly in my ears
"Go on!" said another voice
"Its now or never"
Where am I ? In a battlefield?
Thanks but no thanks
I refused to budge!

Strikingly beautiful??...Ah yes!!:P
So says the corner of eyes
What am I? A coward?
I can't...I simply can't!!
Fresh opportunities come by later , don't they?
"You wish", says the same voice
Say pass and I am doomed
Whatever will be will be
Thats the philosophical me!

Could, might,maybe, in retrospect, in hindsight
Words that form the fulcrum of my dictionary
Never look beyond these words do I?
Subtle hints can't get more obvious!
Subtle....obvious???? Paradoxical.....Whatever!
I prefer to be oblivious
When oportunity bangs on the door
I only hear a faint knock!

The age of passing letters and notes
Are they over?...I quiz myself!
No boss...yet to come!
Sarcastic me in full force
Differential equations and Linear Algebra
Completelt get transmitted overhead
Never made sense , did they?
Nah!
Today is no exception right?
Yep!
I console myself!:)

Decisions , emotions , choices
They rule my lif
"Say hi! Ask her out!"
No way. not on your life!

"Okay Class, Time up. Meet you tomorrow"
Thats it...Over????
Bewildered me!!!

Maths was never my cup of tea!
Next hour...psychology
Maybe she will set next to me!
Maybe Freud will drill some sense into me!!

I wish!!!!!:)

Saluting people who brave the worst!!:)


I closed my eyes
Hazy, Dark, Indescribable
Emotions rippled thro me
Why me? Do I ask myself the quesition?
Millions of people want the answer
Do they have it? A resound NO!
Makes me all the more confident
I wont know the reason either!:)

I shut out all the emotions
I dont want to harbour any ill feelings
"When god brings u to it..
He will bring you thro it"
The oft repeated motivator
Am I standing at the gates of heaven?
A foot here and a foot there
Not knowing where to go?

A good night's rest
Only to wake up and realise
That all this never happened!
How I would love that!
"Alas Thou shall not get what you want!"
My rounds of goodbye...will the time come too soon?
"Till death do us apart"
Seems to fit the bill perfectly!
Whoever coined all this, I muse
Ah there it is, my sense of humour
Good! I'vent lost it all!

I opened my eyes
The world is just as it was
Birds chirping
The faint smell of wet earth
My piping mug of hot coffee
Bryan Adams crroning on my Ipod
The world hasn't taken a U turn has it?
Nope , not as far as I can see

I decide to go with the flow
Suddenly I remember Shakespeare's Seven Stages
He didn't consider such situations I supposed
Destiny will unfold itself
Do I find this plausible?
Least of all , am I convinced?
Nah!
Like hell I'll take that!

I grit my teeth
Fight I will
Lose I may
But never will I take it lying down!

Smile I will,
Thro trials and tribulations
Simply because,
The world is just the same
And
I am ready to run the race against time:)

Cheers

Random thoughts!!!!:)

All I wanted was a smile
And a reassuring nod
To say
All is okay
To say
This too shall pass
I got a hug instead

All I wanted was 5 rupees
To buy that rubber ball
To go out
And play cricket with the guys
To get hurt and scraped
Only to brush away the mud
And start fielding again
I was a gifted a willow instead


All I wanted was for the bell to ring
Just so that science class would end
To pick up
My Famous Five and start reading
In the five minutes I would get
For my next teacher to come
English teacher gave us a free period instead

All I wanted was to go home from school
All alone for the first time
Without someone to say
Hold my hand, be careful!
Just so that I could ride my new cycle
To feel the afternoon sun
To feel the high of riding back home for the first time
My pals accompanied me instead!

All I wanted was for someone to be my best friend
To share all that I possibly could
The usual girl talk
The intellectually stimulating conversations
To share your highs and lows
To simply act as a sounding board
To simply have fun
To rant off when you are at the lowest ebb
I asked for one
I got a fantastic bunch!!!!!! :)

A few one-liners that caught my eye sometime back( well honestly...they are stick-its on my fridge and they've been there for as long as I remember)

Here goes!

• Chocolate , coffee and men....so much better when they are rich!
• Middle age is when a broad mind and a narrow waist exchange places!
• Variety is the spice of life, one day annoy people,the next day ignore them!
• The more people I meet the more I love my dog!

Cheers!

This post is a trip down memory lane. Thoughts and memories which each one of us would be able to relate to in one way or the other, however vague and distant it may seem. Something which would make us all think, "yeah right...how true!!"

As kids we were happy in our own little secluded world. A world which was confined to doing simple and the most silliest of things that we would think twice about right now. When we were the cynosure of everyone's eyes! It may still be the case, am not arguing with that one! When life revolved around bucket loads of water and sand to build that perfect castle. At four we were more bothered about having a "Good and a Star" scribbled across our homework than about....maybe the Middle East crisis!A single tear trickling down our cheeks would create a ruckus at home.Massive fights with our siblings over who would get the bigger piece of the cake were a routine! The last piece tastes the best! You can bet on that!

When life moves on , the complexity of situations takes on a higher degree. Our horizons widen, so does the friends-o-sphere.Come teenage, and we think we rule the world and care a damn about someone elses(read mom and dad) opinion. Right we are, and wrong they are. Countless arguements for all the wrong reasons and we always play defender. Its a whirlwind and bang, we are at the center of it all!Time comes when all the "g's" suddenly disappear from our vocabulary."So man,how's it goin???"Words take a totally different dimension.As we go forward life takes us to even dizzier heights and time becomes a huge constraint and to even exchange a few words with friends becomes a humungous task. At the end of the day , we are too stressed out to even utter a "hi"!

Don't you think , now is the time to rekindle the kid in us?We've all locked it away in one corner of our hearts, and double bolted it.Liven it up. Let go of it all.Life hands you a lemon, make Lemonade..or so they say!What is life for.....if not to live and cherish every moment.Live, like you've never lived before and laugh like you've never laughed before!

Cheers!